Disheartened

Angie · #1 19-07-11, 10:22 PM

Molly is almost 4 1/2 months old and she's ready to do her Bronze Award, she's a pleasure to work with, so willing, intelligent and eager to please like most GSDs. To be honest she ticks most of the boxes to do her Silver Award but we have to wait for enough of the other dogs to be ready to do the Bronze before she can do that one. Before you all think that this is a bragging thread .........it's not. I thought we were doing really well but I've come back from training tonight feeling like I'm letting her down.

She joined a new class today with all different dogs, she's a shy little flower at the best of times and it didn't help when a 12 month old Leonberger got away from it's frail elderly owner twice and launched it's huge clumsy playful frame at Molly. After this had happened she was constantly flicking her head about watching where the Leonberger was. The Head Trainer told me that her focus on me was very poor and that she wasn't listening to me........I wonder why?????

He also critisised her for sitting infront of me after recall, I've never asked her to do that, she just does it. He wants her to stand, then teach sit later for a correct presentation (less than a foot tighter than she's already doing).

The HT watches while one of the other trainers takes the class and he just jumps in if he thinks a dog or owner needs correction. We almost had a one to one session tonight with the amount of time he spent with us!

One of the other trainers came up to me at the end and said that the HT thought Molly had huge potential and that I owed it to her to up her training programme, he sees her as competition material. I don't want to compete her, I've been there and done that. I just want a happy, healthy, well trained dog that does as she's told. I felt like screaming 'SHE'S 4 MONTHS OLD!!!!! STOP PUTTING PRESSURE ON US!'

I've come home feeling completely demoralised and that I'm letting Molly down. I'm not sure I can handle that amount of pressure, I want it to be fun for both of us. I'm being made to feel guilty for not exploiting Molly's trainability. I thought we were doing so well..........obviously not.

#2 19-07-11, 10:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Angie

Molly is almost 4 1/2 months old and she's ready to do her Bronze Award, she's a pleasure to work with, so willing, intelligent and eager to please like most GSDs. To be honest she ticks most of the boxes to do her Silver Award but we have to wait for enough of the other dogs to be ready to do the Bronze before she can do that one. Before you all think that this is a bragging thread .........it's not. I thought we were doing really well but I've come back from training tonight feeling like I'm letting her down.

She joined a new class today with all different dogs, she's a shy little flower at the best of times and it didn't help when a 12 month old Leonberger got away from it's frail elderly owner twice and launched it's huge clumsy playful frame at Molly. After this had happened she was constantly flicking her head about watching where the Leonberger was. The Head Trainer told me that her focus on me was very poor and that she wasn't listening to me........I wonder why?????

He also critisised her for sitting infront of me after recall, I've never asked her to do that, she just does it. He wants her to stand, then teach sit later for a correct presentation (less than a foot tighter than she's already doing).

The HT watches while one of the other trainers takes the class and he just jumps in if he thinks a dog or owner needs correction. We almost had a one to one session tonight with the amount of time he spent with us!

One of the other trainers came up to me at the end and said that the HT thought Molly had huge potential and that I owed it to her to up her training programme, he sees her as competition material. I don't want to compete her, I've been there and done that. I just want a happy, healthy, well trained dog that does as she's told. I felt like screaming 'SHE'S 4 MONTHS OLD!!!!! STOP PUTTING PRESSURE ON US!'

I've come home feeling completely demoralised and that I'm letting Molly down. I'm not sure I can handle that amount of pressure, I want it to be fun for both of us. I'm being made to feel guilty for not exploiting Molly's trainability. I thought we were doing so well..........obviously not.

Awwww Angie big hugs for the way you feel! There are going to be days like this. I would not let this dishearten you! Whether you want to compete or not is up to you, Just go with what is right for you, Just feel proud you have a highly trainable dog that will be an credit to you when you've taught everything that she needs to learn! Don't beat yourself up and don't let anyone make you feel this way! I personally would make it clear to the trainers your intentions and tell them thanks for advice but competing is not the road you want to follow! Maybe they don't realise the pressure they are puting on you! After a wee chat with them maybe you would feel better and if they don't back off I would find an alternative class that makes you feel positive when you leave! JMO I hope you feel better soon big hugs xxxxxxx

Catriona xx

lauraburns · #3 19-07-11, 10:47 PM

You are doing fantastically well with Molly! Do not let anyone put pressure on you to do something you don't want to, otherwise you won't enjoy it and Molly won't enjoy it!

kelpiemad · #4 19-07-11, 11:46 PM

Just do your training for you too both enjoy i still do all the training for canine freestyle at home but i don't know if I will ever compete again I just enjoy the training I feel guilty because I am not doing any agility at the moment and Holly is so good now grade 3 and enjoys it so much I feel as though I am letting her down but diesel is so expensive I can't afford to go to the shows but I feel so bad for her

Angie · #5 19-07-11, 11:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CATRIONAGSDLOVER

Awwww Angie big hugs for the way you feel! There are going to be days like this. I would not let this dishearten you! Whether you want to compete or not is up to you, Just go with what is right for you, Just feel proud you have a highly trainable dog that will be an credit to you when you've taught everything that she needs to learn! Don't beat yourself up and don't let anyone make you feel this way! I personally would make it clear to the trainers your intentions and tell them thanks for advice but competing is not the road you want to follow! Maybe they don't realise the pressure they are puting on you! After a wee chat with them maybe you would feel better and if they don't back off I would find an alternative class that makes you feel positive when you leave! JMO I hope you feel better soon big hugs xxxxxxx

Catriona xx

Thanks Catriona, I just thought some of it was very unnecessary. We were told to examine our dogs tummy, I sent Molly into down, rolled her over and examined her but I was using a 'play' voice telling her what a lovely big, round tummy she'd got, I was told that this wasn't playtime, it was serious and my dog should be made to know that. I'm beginning to think that these people are a bit too intense for us and maybe we need to find somewhere else. Thanks for you words of encouragement xx

Quote:

Originally Posted by lauraburns

You are doing fantastically well with Molly! Do not let anyone put pressure on you to do something you don't want to, otherwise you won't enjoy it and Molly won't enjoy it!

Thank you. I always try to make Molly's training enjoyable and varied for both of us. She feeds off me and if I'm feeling stressed I know she'll be feeling it as well. That won't be good for either of us x

#6 20-07-11, 12:36 AM

Dont feel disheartened Hunni
Your both doing great

Fun fun fun at Mollys tender age
Hope you can both start to enjoy it again
Linda x

#7 20-07-11, 08:00 AM

I can sympathise.. training can feel pressured. I'm having this with Zee - the commands they want me to use conflict with what I've done with her so far, so I'm wondering how I'm going to 're-train' her

or indeed if I want to.

They don't do the bronze silver and gold where I train but there are tests. I don't see the point if the dog will do what you want, of having to 'prove' it under a test ? I guess I'm just not competitive !

LucyA · #8 20-07-11, 08:24 AM

Angie, don't listen to them, at the end of the day, its a compliment that Molly shows so much potential so soon and they probably meant it well.
Sometimes it can feel awful - I know but try and keep your chin up and remember you only need to go as far as you want to! x

#9 20-07-11, 09:06 AM

im sorry but i fail to see why you would let someone make you feel this way.... shes your dog and you need to tell them to back off. There are plenty of other clubs out there if they dont!

Caryll · #10 20-07-11, 09:13 AM

I think I may be a little more outspoken than you! I'd have told them in no uncertain terms that although the Bronze, Siver & Gold awards are good to have, they're not the be all & end all in training, and that you don't want to compete, just have a well behaved, sociable dog!

At 4 and a half months, I wouldn't even be thinking in terms of 'instant' obedience, I'd be like you - everything's fun to do, so the dog wants to do it. I think serious training at 4 & a half months is a mistake - she's still a puppy for pity's sake!

I think you're going to have to explain how you feel to the head trainer - tell him that you're flattered that they think she's competition standard, but you're not interested in competing.