The Man, Rules..... a must read !!

maxandskye · #1 18-11-09, 09:38 PM

The Man Rules

at last a man has taken the time to write all this down

Finally, the mans side of the story

(I must admit it's pretty good)

We always hear " the rules"

from the female side

NOW HERE ARE THE RULES FROM THE MALE SIDE

These are our rules !!

Please note...These are all numbered "1"

ON PURPOSE !!

1. Men are NOT mind readers

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.

You're a big girl. If if's up, put it down.

We need it up, you need it down.

You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports is like the full moon.

Or the changing of the ti des.

Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.

Let us be clear on this one:

Subtle hints do not work !

Strong hints do not work !

Obvious hints do not work !

Just say it !!!

1. Yes and no are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem ONLY if you want help solving it.

That's what we do.

Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. ANYTHING we said 6 months ago is inadmissable in an argument.

In fact, all comments become Null and Void after 7 days.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.

Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways,

and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we

meant the OTHER ONE.

1. You can either ask us to do something,

or tell us how you want it done.

Not both !

If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say what you have to

during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus DID NOT need directions,

and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like WINDOWS default settings.

Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin

is also a fruit. We have NO idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it WILL be scratched.

We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing", we will

act like nothing is wrong. We know you are lying

but it's just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to,

expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything

you wear is fine.....Really !!

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared

to discuss such topics as baseball or motor sports.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.

Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know I have to sleep on the couch tonight; But did you know that men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

Pass this to as many men as you can, give them a laugh.

Pass this to as many women as you can, give them an even bigger laugh !